random thought #24

logic...
I am a logical being. My life trained me to be a rational persona.
My choice of habit led me to see black, white but no shades of gray. I still see them but when asked i blind myself to them.
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The world i know is made of logical structures, this has, as i've recently discovered more and more, great disavantages in the 'real' world, people aren't logical. They can't be predicted, expected... Merely accepted.
When pushed i fall back to logic, to reason. Sounds nice doesn't it? It's not. It makes me a cold person, it makes it hard to relate, to understand feelings to sense people...
Finally i, think, have found the reason to why just feeling something is so hard for me, because i need to back it up with reason, and emotions are in the grey shades not in the black and white spectre of things...
Recently i felt, but because of recklessness not of reason. the other me, the one that's always struggling to comeout and play. To fuck me up...
Arguments can't rely on logic or reason to be argued, but rather on self control of emotions, on the ability to feel the other person, not reason...
emotions...