random thought #12

nostalgia...
nostalgia has become a great part of myself. I spend way too much brain power dwelling on it. The problem is the past makes me who i am, so i'm trying to incorporate the past in me without actually thinking about it. So it becomes and intrinsic part of my persona and not a sentinent one. The biggest problem with the past is that it easily pours memories, and memories are usually pleasant, or seldomly painful, wich means that you get stuck in them because time has the ability to make things look more intense, so if it's a good memory it becomes even better and in the same logic a painful one becomes even worse. That's why it always seems like the past is always better than the present, altough it rarely is. I only want what i don't have, and don't give enough credit to what i do have.
This has to be one the most important changes in me, to want what i have and fight for what i want, without dwelving into what i had.
optimism...